Blood Glam Aniron

Words on a screen
so powerful
so important
I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t affected by you in some way

Initial explosions of lust,
a grand struggle for power
a need to understand everything
a need to understand you

Still, I went on my way, rationalizing my fears
hiding from the risk of loss
and you stood fast, holding my hand day by day
soothing my wounds with your own
a reflection of my own light
a reflection of my own fragmented being
and I didn’t understand
I couldn’t
but now I do
now I understand everything
 
I remember a time when all I wanted was for this to be
you and me
but I was broken, you were broken
we broke each other
your love broke me
never before had I known such a feeling
and it terrified me
and I fled
and I fell into the depths of hell head first
I left you in hell

I could feel that, you know, when we went our separate ways
I don’t know or understand how
At first I blocked everything out
tried my hardest to forget
tried my hardest to escape
to move on
and I did
or so I thought
 
But then one morose weekend by coincidence I’ll never know,
I bumped into you whilst roaming around in the darkness
some telepathy, such connection
It seems not even fate could give up on us
Not even time and space could separate us
I felt your pain as my own
And it ruined me.
I had never cared for someone the way I do you
I wanted you to live
I wanted you to feel love
yet I couldn’t let myself live
and I couldn’t let myself feel love.
 
You and I, we haven’t had the best life
Growing up abused; torn apart,
left as nothing but scraps for the beasts stalking us outside our doors,
we held on to what we could
We held onto each other, a sense of freedom in understanding
We shared each others pain, easing the burden
We took what we could, and gave what was safe
We fed off of each other like the blood thirsty vampires we pretended to be,
hated like the demons who made us this way
But in the end, none of that mattered.
 
But you matter, Taniya. You always have done.
You truly are my blessing, a reflection of my soul, my mirror
I see you in me, I feel me in you
You don’t have to run anymore, dear
by some miracle I’ve been given a second chance
I’ve been healed, and now I realize the power of love within me
love for everyone, love for you
and so love I shall
I shall love you to my hearts content
Because you are worth it.
Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise
You deserve love more than anyone
believe my words, they have never rang any truer
 
You are such an inspiration, the complexity and yet innocence of your emotions such a relief to my soul, your gracing presence soothing my wounds, your zest for life making me see things anew
 
These are the things that I ran from
But it’s these things that now I admire so much in you
These part of you in me, they make me whole
And I want nothing more than to explore their depths with you
guiding each other as we always have done
through the madness and into the beyond, towards the fountain of youth,
where we drink and laze about in each others arms
under a sky full of stars, and rest, and rejuvenate our souls.
 
It’s funny how in the beginning you started out as a type of emotional fix
another stranger passing by online
I never knew you would become the centre of my world
I never knew darkness could shine so bright
So don’t give up hope
You are more brilliant than you realize
And I’m here for you
as you always were for me
and I always will be
even when I’m not
I will be.
Never forget
 
You are just simply outstandingly beautiful, in both mind, body, and soul, and I am honoured to have been given the chance to journey this far with you in life. I hope that our paths stay together for a long time to come. I couldn’t find better company even if I tried. You are one of a kind, a precious jewel, a rare gold, and I love you.
You and I can learn to love again
 
And after all this time
Maybe that is how I knew you were the one~

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